I have a few questions for those that hate or simply didn't enjoy the book...
Did you read the entire text?
And if so...
Did you catch her satire and that she realized her extreme ways and that she regrets losing her temper?
Did you catch her satire and that she realized her extreme ways and that she regrets losing her temper?
Don't we all want to be better than we were "back then" and learn along the way?
But I suppose my most probing question is...
But I suppose my most probing question is...
Are we too insecure in our own parenting that we can't learn from other cultures both in their strengths and weaknesses? Can we be critical of ourselves?
I don't want to seem mean, but as an educator I feel like we as "Westerners" are too lackadaisical in how we encourage our children to excel and overcome challenges. I understand that generalizations don't help anyone, but don't you need to generalize to begin to notice a pattern? I feel like this is what Amy Chua was trying to do. We can all relate to her stereotypes as we can all see ourselves and others in those same categories that she presented. So why are we ticked about that?
I wanted to get this out there as I loved the book and I don't think that is a bad thing. I absolutely have no intention of yelling at Savannah and ever calling her garbage, but I have every intention to do anything I can to help her see that just because something is hard it doesn't mean that she can't work to achieve her very best. We will have what some may view as a "strict" home, but there will never be a lack of devotion, love, or hugs if I do my best and always look at what more I can do.
4 comments:
I love this post Shannah! I liked the book too and I felt the same way you did. Each culture's way of parenting has its own strengths and weaknesses. This helped me see our Western parenting style weaknesses and I am happy to embrace what is good about the "Chinese" way of raising children (although I too, will leave out the "garbage" business). :)
I havent read the book yet. i read few chapters while i was at a bookstore once, but i havent finished it. I will put it on my library reserve list promptly. I think her idea of showing kids how much they can do and demanding their best is great. I worry that i might be too soft at times because it is hard to be strict and demanding. Of course, I am not speaking academically yet since we aren't at that stage in our kids' lives yet but more so behaviorally. However, I do not agree with the fact that a kid needs to know so much so early. In Finland, we dont start school until we are 7 and Finnish kids score highest (with the Chinese) in math all the time.
I'm curious when you say that you will have a strict home, what do you mean by that?
I think I will love the book. I think you can love a book and be interested in it, learn from it without agreeing with it.
I haven't read this one, but maybe I'll have to. But what I wanted to say is that I almost ALWAYS leave book clubs with feelings of anger and frustration. I hate how one mindset gets pushed and nobody actually seems to grow from reading something and discussing it in a way that allows our preconceived notions and opinions to be challenged. Not that we all have to agree or that reading something should change our worldview to something not in harmony with our core values, but it seems that too often we just look for what points in a book back up our ideas instead of looking for something. . . deeper? More significant? Challenging? Maybe all of these things.
I agree with you! I really enjoyed the book. And after reading it, I realized that I really could "raise the bar" around here for my children and for what my expectations of them are. Example: Madelyn used to practice each of her piano songs two times a day. Enter Amy Chua. I now have her practice each song ten times a day (and it hardly takes 30 minutes let alone 3 hours). Not only is she more than capable of doing so, but now she is excelling in piano far more quickly than before; her teacher is amazed at the difference and so am I. And like I said, this is just one example of a small change I've made toward raising my expectations. There are many more--all of which have made my children and our home work better.
After reading this book I've found a happy medium for our family and am grateful for the challenge of really helping my kids to rise to their full potential, which, I think, is far greater than even we as mothers think it is. Our kids are capable and brilliant, if we would only give them the opportunity and challenge to be!
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